BMW Repair: Central Locking, needle nose pliers, having a good time

Question
Hi, I have a 316i 1995 BMW and the central locking has stopped working.  Now I can't open the passenger door with the key and the boot is locked (key won't open it) - not having a good time.  Can you tell me how to fix this, please??!!

Answer
Just answered this in detail and my PC "lost it"

Here we go again.
Sounds like the boot actuator is frozen in the lock position, also sending a constant lock signal.

This is a bit cowboyish but it works, you will need access to another e36 for a few minutes just for a quick view of the related linkage in the boot.  just pull back the cosmetic cover near the boot lock on the inside of the boot on the "doner" car.Find the long rod on the drivers side(UK) and make a reference point on YOUR car under the already removed number plate.Drill a SMALL  hole big enough to get to this long rod and move it downwards WITH A SCREWDRIVER OR NEEDLE NOSE PLIERS, this will unlock the boot. unplug and replace the boot actuater.Paint the bare metal on the drilled hole, cover with black tape and replace the number plate.

remember to have the alarm off.

Hope this helps